Design a Gift Experience that Crosses Generations  

As people age, they tend to realize all the stuff they have. Stacked in the cupboards, stashed in the attic, or shoved in the basement, the material possessions of a lifetime tend to become overwhelming. A Christmas present for a person with a house full of possessions might seem silly and it can lack the meaning and emotional investment of a shared experience. This year, blend nostalgia and modern media to craft a gift of time and togetherness for your aging family members. Consider these creative ideas instead:

Movie Time

Find out your senior’s favorite movie from his or her school days or early adulthood. Make arrangements to rent or stream the vintage flick on a large screen. Gather family and friends and ask your older person about his or her life at the time the movie was made. Make sweets or popcorn and turn the lights down for a watch party. Be prepared to adjust the volume so everyone can hear well. Even though the movie will have a slower pace and fewer special effects than modern cinema, encourage young people to soak up the old-time experience. They will learn something new!

Vintage TV

Old-time Westerns, Lawrence Welk, or early episodes of soap operas can all be found online or at the library. Choose a couple of TV shows that will bring back memories for your person, and for the people who grew up listening to them as the soundtrack of their younger lives. The sights and sounds of these old shows will be a catalyst for conversation. Serve snacks, sandwiches, or sweets from that bygone era.

Custom Playlists

Design a custom playlist of songs that were popular or appreciated by your older person when he or she was 18-25 years old. Dance hall tunes, patriotic songs, or even folk songs in a family’s first language can all be part of the collection. Mothers will like to hear the lullabies they used to sing to their babies. Load the songs to a phone, iPod, or tablet so you can play them for your older person. Sometimes soft earphones work well, but you may want to cast the music to your speakers so everyone can enjoy the experience. Be respectful and don’t talk over the songs so your older person can soak up the experience.  Stop between songs to talk about what you just heard or what memories were conjured up. Play DJ and introduce the next song and artist.

YouTube

Arrange ahead of time to have family members create short videos for your older person. Ask them all the same question or change it up, depending on who is participating. For example, “Tell Grandma what you loved about visiting her on the farm.” Or ask littler kids to talk about what they are enjoying at school or in their sports activities. Upload the videos to YouTube and curate the collection so you can show your person all his or her customized videograms. It helps to do a bit of light editing to combine the videos into one presentation.

Your special effort to share a new-old experience, combined with the wonder of technology, will surely fascinate your special person. Invest in being present, not buying presents, and your gift will be more valuable than gold.

The Gift is to be Present to One Another

By Colleen Harvot, Director of In-Home Care at Valley VNA Senior Care

This blog was originally posted by the Oshkosh Area Community Foundation. Memory Care Respite Partners is offered in both Oshkosh and Neenah. Information on how to pre-register for each location is noted below.

I am very fortunate to be part of Memory Care Respite Partners, a twice-monthly program in Oshkosh. It’s ironic that a program developed for people and families experiencing memory loss has proven itself so successful at making new memories. Every time I participate in an afternoon session, I see people discovering community as they come together to support one another.

First, a short explanation of Memory Care Respite Partners: it is a community collaboration to provide free respite care for caregivers to people experiencing memory loss, Alzheimer’s, or dementia. The Oshkosh program is offered by reservation on the third and fourth Tuesdays of the month from 1:30-3:30 p.m. at Our Savior’s Lutheran Church at 1860 Wisconsin Street in Oshkosh.

Music is a big part of Memory Care Respite Partners.

The program is a partnership between Winnebago ADRC, Our Savior’s Lutheran Church, and Valley VNA Senior Care. These partners saw a crucial unmet need for caregiver support, many of whom are spouses or children of aging parents. The Oshkosh Area Community Foundation supported our desire to come together to share our time and expertise to give caregivers a well-earned break with a $4,000 Community Impact grant to start the Oshkosh Memory Care Respite program. Together we create a safe, nonjudgmental, and respectful space for people with memory loss.

I participate in each session as the respite care coordinator and work alongside Courtnie, a Valley VNA-employed professional caregiver who is available to help up to 10 participants with personal cares and behavioral assistance during our time together. The rest of the energy and enthusiasm is provided by an incredible volunteer corps from Our Savior’s. These men and women step forward to engage with our respite clients in genuine companionship. The men tend to gather together as menfolk often do, and the ladies enjoy lively visits with one another. We honor one another’s humanity, treat one another as we would wish to be treated, share some music while we play bingo, make a craft, or create a simple culinary masterpiece in one of our most popular activities, “Cooking with Courtnie.”

Carol and Jim Kossel participate on Memory Care Respite Partners in Oshkosh

Carol Kossel is a full-time caregiver to her husband Jim, 78, and she especially loves the volunteers from Our Savior’s when they come together to Memory Care Respite Partners in Oshkosh. “They are so kind and so welcoming to Jim,” she said. “I never see any hesitation from him, despite the fact that he doesn’t speak much anymore.” She treasures her monthly breaks from caregiving and the chance for Jim to interact with other people besides herself. “I am really, really thankful. I don’t know what we would do without regular outings, to only be at home 24 hours a day.”

I have worked in senior care for more than 30 years and still only marvel at the commitment of caregiving spouses and children who work 24/7 to keep their husband, wife, or parent healthy, safe, and content in the midst of life-altering memory loss. In a world of uncertainty, it is a privilege to be part of a team whose sole purpose is to be present to one another. For me, it’s where new memories are made.

Participants in the Oshkosh Memory Care Respite Partners must call ahead to Vicki at Our Savior’s at (920) 235-4850 to make a reservation. This is a free program.

Memory Care Respite Partners is also offered in Neenah on the first and second Mondays of each month, from 1:30-3:30 p.m., at St. Paul Lutheran Church on N. Commercial Street. Call (920) 383-1180 to make a reservation.

Joelin Mueller, Gwen Van Handel, RN; and Christy Feuersthaler are Certified Dementia Practitioners© at Valley VNA.

Specialized Training to Assess, Soothe People with Dementia and Help Colleagues, Families

By Joelin Mueller, CDP, Valley VNA Life Enrichment Team Lead

Three caregivers at Valley VNA Senior Care have earned our Certified Dementia Practitioner© Certification from the National Council of Certified Dementia Practitioners (NCCDP). Gwen Van Handel, RN; Christy Feuersthaler, music coordinator, and I now hold the CDP© designation. Together with our direct caregiving experience and education, we completed additional training to achieve this specialized certification. The certification term is two years and requires 10 hours of continuing education for renewal.

I believe the investment in extraordinary dementia caregiving training raises the level of knowledge, thoughtful discussion, and continuous improvement surrounding caregiving to people experiencing Alzheimer’s, dementia, or memory loss. We are part of a process that is continually providing updates and education on topics like how to sooth an agitated person, behavior assessment tools, and other best practices. I can recognize a behavior and step in to help our residents and be a resource to my co-workers. Certified Dementia Practitioners© also meet with resident and client families, especially when their loved ones are experiencing significant changes in their behaviors and abilities.

Valley VNA Senior Care holds Wisconsin Assisted Living Association (WALA) Diamond-Accreditation for assisted living communities, and Certified Dementia Practitioner© Certification is part of our ongoing quality improvement (QI) efforts.

People with Alzheimer’s, Dementia Benefit from Calming Effects, Caregiving

There is something instinctual about how an adult immediately begins to sway and gently pat a baby’s back as soon as he or she begins to hold her. Those instincts to soothe (and receive) comfort remain with people even in the midst of Alzheimer’s and dementia. That’s why Joelin Mueller, life enrichment team lead at Valley VNA, has begun the careful rollout of doll therapy among receptive residents and families.

Doll therapy at Valley VNA offers residents the opportunity to hold, care for, or even “adopt” a lifelike doll or stuffed animal. This is because people with Alzheimer’s or dementia often experience distressing feelings of anxiety, anger, depression, and suspicion. Just as psychologist John Bowlby first established in 1969, attachment to an object can serve as an anchor in the midst of uncertainty. When a person with dementia embraces caring for a doll-baby, they are much less likely to experience these feelings of agitation, aggression, or wandering. “Residents love the sense of purpose they have in caring for their babies. They like being a caregiver, too, not just the one receiving care,” Mueller said. She explained there are many group activities each day at Valley VNA, but dolls also provide individual, engaging activity throughout the day instead of periods of sitting, sleeping, or watching TV. And the best part? It’s a holistic approach to wellness that does not require the use of pharmaceuticals to calm an agitated person.

Mueller is aware of some resident and family concerns about the use of doll therapy; namely, that it could be perceived and patronizing or infantilizing an adult with Alzheimer’s or dementia. “We are not saying that our residents are children again,” Mueller said. “We are saying that life has changed, and we can change with it.” When a doll or stuffed animal is introduced to a person who is obviously distressed, it can prevent that person from further decline or retreat. “This gives staff another opportunity to engage with our person; that chance is not lost. Residents can communicate their need for support and affection in a way they cannot otherwise express because of the progression of their disease.”

There are currently eight therapeutic dolls at Valley VNA called Pearl’s Memory Babies and several stuffed dogs. In Mueller’s experience, men are more drawn to caring for a pet dog than a baby, but this is not always the case. Pearl’s Memory Babies are not a specific type of doll; rather, they tend to have more lifelike qualities and are weighted to feel more like a real baby. To coincide with the lifelike dolls, residents have access to realistic baby bottles, clothing, and blankets. “Staff help keep the dolls clean and safe,” Mueller said, “and we never force a baby or a pet dog on a person. It’s got to be a good fit, and when it is, it’s a beautiful thing.”

Our original donor to the program is Connie Siedl who has a website set up just for these types of dolls and dogs.

Staff Nurses and Hospice Care in Assisted Living

By Erin Kaskavitch, R.N., Clinical Consultant at Valley VNA Senior Care

I came to Valley VNA last year from a prior position as a hospice nurse and case manager. One of my responsibilities is to get to know our residents and families who are in need of hospice care and work with them to follow their wishes for a peaceful, comfortable end-of-life. Here are some aspects of my hospice work that many people do not know:

Family Empowerment

When a person lives in an assisted living community and needs hospice services, the family is empowered to choose the hospice service that will come in to provide care. Valley VNA Senior Care is like most other senior living communities in that we do not have hospice caregivers on staff, but we welcome and collaborate with outside services all the time. We can help answer questions about hospice programs in the Valley, and our VNA team is very good at helping families transition into hospice care with confidence and comfort.

Everyone Stays Connected

It’s distinctive for Valley VNA to have a staff nurse who is an RN and specifically experienced as a hospice case manager. Every day, I communicate with residents, families, doctors, and hospice agencies, and that helps everyone feel more informed and heard. I also like getting to know our residents who are on hospice (or before), because understanding their diagnosis, personality, and interests helps our entire team provide them with the best care possible.

On-Site RNs Respond Quickly

We have three RNs on staff at Valley VNA and our training helps us catch problems early. Direct caregivers don’t have to call an off-site service to report issues and wait for a reply, which means we often prevent smaller problems from snowballing into hospitalizations or significant patient discomfort or anxiety. When I talk to friends and family about looking for a place for their parents, I emphasize that on-site RNs are very important—for many reasons!

The Human Side of Hospice

Daughters and sons of our hospice residents can call and speak directly with an RN to ask questions or simply check-in for peace of mind. We remove layers of worry by communicating directly with physicians, and we keep family members in the loop. Most of all, a daughter or son (or friend, niece, or nephew) can have a better relationship with their person in hospice when the physical caregiving duties are covered. Now is the time to talk about memories, share advice, laugh, or simply sit with one another in friendship. So much of life is lived at the end. The right caregiving team can help make those moments count.

How to Search for a Quality, Caring Senior Living Community

By Tara Pichelmeyer, Senior Living Advisor, Valley VNA Senior Care

Emotional, physical, financial, and geographical factors all impact the choice of a loved one’s senior living community, but some factors are simply non-negotiable, especially safety and trustworthiness. Ideally, a family will prepare in advance for a move, but many more times they must decide quickly after an illness or medical emergency. If you are able to visit several places during your search, you will discover how different they all are. Please choose wisely! Here is a list of five non-negotiables I like to share with families:

Non-Negotiable #1:  They provide quality, resident-centered care.

As people age, their needs will change for the long or short term. If mom moves into an apartment and graduates to needing more assistance, how do you add services? What if she needs a short period of extra help, such as recovery from an illness or surgery? Will she have to move to a new room, or will she be able to stay in her original apartment? Your advisor should be able to explain what happens and how family members are kept informed.

Remember to ask for a list of references. Your guide should be prepared to immediately send or give you a list of current employees and residents’ family members who can speak to the authentic culture of the organization.  If you are comparing brand new facilities with established ones, be aware that the newer places will most likely not have a bank of knowledgeable references.

Ask who owns the senior community. Ownership structure significantly impacts how funds are distributed or reinvested. There are both for-profit and non-profit assisted living facilities. Non-profit organizations are required to reinvest their earnings back into the organization and the well-being of its residents, whereas for-profit organizations are not.

Non-Negotiable #2: They are clean and safe for residents.

Cleanliness in an assisted living environment is non-negotiable. To protect the health and safety of all residents and staff, the best assisted living communities invest in consistent property maintenance and cleanliness. Staff members are meticulous about their own personal hygiene as well as the grooming and hygiene of residents.

Resident safety is closely tied to caregiver training and experience. The longevity of caregivers and registered nurses is an important reflection on their job satisfaction. Full-time registered nurses on staff are important for developing each person’s individual care plan and supervising CNAs and other caregivers if they uncover a medical concern. Registered nurses are also a great help in communicating effectively with a resident’s doctors and specialists. Ask if RNs work on staff, how long they’ve been on staff, and how direct caregivers are trained.

Learn about the community’s 24-hour procedures for addressing problems that may arise. If you are looking at assisted living-level care, ask for accreditation documentation, because it will prove the safety and care audits the staff has passed—a big deal when it comes to complex medication management, chronic disease management, and caring for people with Alzheimer’s or dementia.

Non-Negotiable #3: They are designed to feel like home.

For many residents of senior living communities, the move from home can be one of the most traumatic events of their later years. Cheerfully decorated and comfortable living areas and gathering spaces can ease that transition. For example, one lounge may be dedicated to quiet table games while another has a large-screen TV for football games or family parties. Residents assign meaning to each space and seek out the place and activity where their friends are, almost like pleasant neighborhoods.

Also, is it obvious that experts who specialize in senior housing environments have been consulted? If so, you will see a mix of warm and cool tones, both energizing and soothing. Carpet color and texture should be chosen to minimize falling hazards, and individual apartments should come in neutral colors so residents can personalize their homes. Sometimes people are even given the choice of accent colors for their living rooms or kitchens—and maintenance staff will paint it for them. All this says a lot about how a senior community values its individual members.

Non-Negotiable #4: They welcome family and friends.

Family and friends play a vital role in a senior person’s emotional well-being. Great senior living communities welcome visitors for everything from scheduled activities to which family members are specifically invited, to impromptu visits. Ask how to get activity updates online, and you will see how much thought goes into planning enrichment activities for residents. Also inquire about how to call ahead to have food prepared for you so you can share a meal when you arrive—and get a taste of what’s on the menu. (Meal charges are typically applied to the resident’s monthly bill.) Ask if you can reserve a room for a larger family group, and bring them in to see where your loved one now lives. Not only will you enjoy your visit, staff should greet you warmly and welcome your questions and observations.

Non-Negotiable #5: They allow residents to pursue things that feed their soul.

From social clubs to raised bed gardens, the best senior living communities offer opportunities for older adults to pursue their passions. It’s especially important to offer people the chance to stay engaged with the larger community, whether its rickshaw rides, van excursions, or visiting performers who visit from the local high school. Look for a complete schedule of activities that includes arts and crafts, exercise and stretching, music, trivia, worship, and cooking. If your loved one has a special hobby, ask how he or she can showcase those talents. Most of all, choose a community that celebrates each person’s individuality.  That’s simply non-negotiable.