Isolation & Loneliness is Unhealthy for Seniors

Joelin Mueller, Life Enrichment Assistant

Everyone likes quiet time alone for a refreshing nap, a good book, or a cup of coffee. After a lifetime of work and family responsibilities, many seniors find this new stage of their lives to be liberating—a new era of relaxation. However, there is a big difference between the choice to spend time alone and feeling lonely. When an older person feels lonely, it’s usually because he or she does not have the option of spending time with other people due to dwindling social circles, poor health, loss of a spouse, or transportation obstacles. For seniors in particular, this isolation can be a genuine threat to health and overall wellness. Consider these facts:

  • Feelings of chronic loneliness threaten a person’s health as much as smoking and obesity
  • Isolation can cause high blood pressure, depression, and a spike in the stress hormone cortisol. These conditions can lead to heart disease and stroke.
  • Lack of social interaction and purposeful living fosters a higher rate of cognitive decline which can lead to dementia.

Scholars have researched the American phenomenon of seniors who adamantly express their desire to “age in place;” that is, grow old in their homes, often alone. Up to 98 percent of older Americans aspire to this lifestyle, despite centuries of human history where the elderly are well integrated into larger social groups, be they families, cross-generational housing, or senior-focused communities. What are the reasons for this expressed wish to grow old in isolation? From old-fashioned American individualism to anxiety over change, seniors who are isolated often deprive themselves of an important time in their lives when they can feel better, care for themselves as they deserve, and continue to help others. Consider these findings:

  • Seniors who interact with other people are better able to perceive others’ needs, not just focus on their own. Their thoughts do not only turn inward, and therefore they are able to maintain healthy mutual relationships.
  • Seniors who are socially engaged can use their lifelong talents and wisdom to help others and discover new or renewed senses of purpose.
  • Humans never stop learning. Isolation blocks new ideas and activities that fuel the mind’s deep need for stimulation, and this poses a threat to mental clarity and cognitive health.
  • We build emotional resilience when we nurture optimism and regulate our responses to life’s ups and downs. When we spend our days alone, we tend to become pessimistic and reactionary—two big reasons why friends and family may stay away from visiting more often.
  • People who take in different perspectives and ideas develop skills to define their place in the world. Seniors in particular have a gift for discovering joy and connecting with their hearts, an ability that can usher in spiritual peace.
  • Scholars contend that community programs and senior living options help resolve issues of isolation and offer more benefits if they are considered earlier than later.

Better health, meaningful relationships, and peaceful hearts. Choosing to stay connected with other people as we grow older is a choice for a longer, happier life. To assess your level of isolation, or that of someone you love, use this online tool. Then make a move toward better wellness!

 

Dear Volunteers at Valley VNA,

To the kind people who deliver Meals on Wheels every week, yours is a ministry far beyond a hot meal delivered. Thank you for the gentle knock at the door, the warm smile, and the question, “How are you today?” We look forward to your visits and feel good knowing that you will be there to check on us.

Thank you for visiting us who are friends and acquaintances from your church or other houses of worship. When you come with prayer cards, communion, hand-knit blankets, and the weekly church bulletin or newsletter, the people who live here feel valued and involved.

Thank you for following through on your desire to pedal our new red rickshaws for our residents even after you discovered you’d have to attend three training sessions and practice in chilly weather. This summer will be so much more fun with the possibility of a good old-fashioned bike ride.

Whenever we hear the piano or flute or guitar, we are drawn to the music you play. When you invite us to sing songs we remember, our days are happier and good memories come flowing back. It’s one of the greatest gifts you can give us.

Thank you for agreeing to be a Valley VNA Celebrity Chef and sharing your recipes cooking-class style. To be in a kitchen again, with a little extra help from our friends, is a joy. Taste-testing is our favorite part.

Thank you for the treats and notes you bring to our caregivers. We like to know you see all their hard work. They tell us about your surprises and we are so proud of you for being such a good person.

Every year we need to be reminded to get another flu shot, and every year you show up and volunteer at clinics in the community because you understand immunizations keep us all safer. When you help protect us, we feel valued.

Thank you for bringing your gentle four-legged friends. When we pet your dog or cat (or horse!), our anxiety is soothed and we immediately remember our own beloved animals. Your pet is always so patient with us and it feels good to experience unconditional love all packaged up in a warm, soft, and accepting creature.

To the talented people who step up to serve on the volunteer Valley VNA board of directors, even though you have jobs to attend and businesses to run, thank you making complex decisions about budgets and staffing and long-term plans for Valley VNA. You help transform a mission statement into a mission accomplished.

Thank you to the gardeners who keep our growing spaces full of blooms and vegetable plants. You share your talents and knowledge so that we can enjoy the sights and scents of summertime—and pluck a tomato or bloom for our room!

When you come to see us, your loved ones, and talk to the staff about our questions if we can’t do it very well ourselves, thank you for being our advocates. We know you didn’t ask to take on this responsibility, but please know we appreciate all the paperwork and appointments and concern you express for us. We’ve lived long lives and we see the love in your gift of time.

Thank you for listening. To the stories we love to tell, to our grumbles about our aches and pains, or to the words we say when we are anxious or confused. We love it when you ask questions and we can reminisce and share our wisdom. If we get mixed up, you just go along for the ride and help us find our way again. When one of us turns to you and asks, “Now, who are you to me?” you remind us with such gentleness. It feels peaceful to spend time with you.

For decades, we helped others grow up and grow old. Now is our chance to rest and receive your gifts of time and attention. Volunteers like you are people who step up when they see a need. You make us proud.

Thank you,

The People of Valley VNA

 

 

Valley VNA Donors Are Generous and Diverse

By Theresa Pichelmeyer, President and CEO, Valley VNA Senior Care

It’s that time of year when Valley VNA leaders publish the Valley VNA Senior Care Annual Report. Because we are a non-profit organization with an active board of directors, this report records and communicates our income, expenditures, and major programs and activities from the prior calendar year. The printed report is ultimately mailed to our families and donors with a thank you letter and invitation to continue to support our shared community mission.

As I paused to review this year’s letter, I thought about how our supporters in the community make hundreds of donations every year that are as varied as the people we serve. We need all of these different gifts because they make Valley VNA—and Neenah—the beautiful and life-giving community we know and love. Not all of our donors give money; nor do all of our donors volunteer. But together, all of our donors make us better, more vital, and more connected to one another.

If you support the mission of Valley VNA, if your loved one is living safely and happily with our help, or if he or she has passed on and you’d like to honor his or her memory, please consider becoming a donor. There are many ways to show your love and appreciation:

 

Share Your Interests

  • We are seeking volunteers to help in our garden courtyard to keep things fresh and occasionally help our resident-gardeners with their raised bed plots.
  • We have regular craft and art club activities where volunteers share helping hands and upbeat energy with our residents
  • Musicians are always welcome! Young and old are invited to play their instruments for our residents and clients.
  • Become a bike rickshaw pilot and give beautiful bike rides to our residents and clients this summer.
  • Please contact us at lifeenrichment@valleyvna.org or call us at 920-727-5555 in our Life Enrichment department to volunteer.

 

Send a Monetary Donation

Donate online or send a check of any amount to support the activities and building that make VNA a warm and welcoming place. If you’re unsure how to proceed, here are a couple of ideas:

  1. Make a Donation to honor the memory of a loved one or pay tribute to someone (anniversary, milestone birthday, etc.) by making a donation in their name.
  2. Designate your Thrivent Choice dollars each year to Valley VNA Health System. Or each time you purchase on Amazon, consider the percentage of your purchase in the Amazon Smiles program and designate Valley VNA as your nonprofit of choice!
  3. Annual Gift – Please consider making a donation to the Valley VNA’s Annual Friends Campaign.

 

Make a Planned Gift

If you are interested in making a large contribution or making a planned gift, please contact Tammy Malewski, Valley VNA Director of Marketing and Fundraising. She will work with you to help make arrangements that meet your giving goals.

 

Bring Bakery or Blooms

Our caregivers always love a plate of homemade muffins, fruit, or other delicious treats. Sometimes a family will bring a bouquet of flowers with a note of appreciation, and it’s a real morale boost to know our teams’ special efforts are recognized and appreciated.

 

Make a Referral

There is no greater compliment than to receive a referral that brings a new client, resident, or employee to Valley VNA. A kind word about Valley VNA, expressed at church, among friends, or within your family is a gift that grows our organization and our impact within the community.

 

Thank you for more than 110 years of community support for Valley VNA. We couldn’t carry out our mission without you.

 

I was his wife again

Betty King recalls the day she helped move her husband Gene to Valley VNA in 2014. “When we finished the move, I felt a powerful sense of physical and emotional relief. After just a couple of days, Gene was seeing me as his wife again, not his caregiver.”

Gene King started to recognize changes in his cognition 20 years earlier while working as a Kimberly Clark IT executive in London, England. After having watched his mother experience relatively early onset Alzheimer’s, he and Betty talked about how and when he would retire. More importantly, they agreed on their philosophy for how to age gracefully together: embrace the coming changes as a new stage of life, genuinely love and advocate for one another, and do not resist the inevitable at the cost of making things stressful for the other partner or the couple’s children.

Gene and Betty eventually retired to North Carolina where they embraced a life of golf, canasta, travel, and volunteer work for 14 years. Gene’s cognitive decline continued, albeit inconsistently. The couple returned to Wisconsin in 2012 to be near two of their children and reunite with their wide circle of friends from Gene’s earlier stint at Kimberly Clark in Neenah. “We had lived in Neenah for almost 20 years, and we started talking about a good place for Gene to live when the time came. My daughter Kelley reminded us that Valley VNA was here,” said Betty.

Those early talks and plans helped both Gene and Betty make necessary transitions without a lot of upset. Gene remained polite, cheerful, and helpful—always the consummate gentleman. “He stopped driving on his own, without argument,” Betty said. “Except he always drove to church on Sunday mornings, but never back home. I always drove home!”

While still living together in their apartment, Betty taped a sign to the door to prevent his wandering off. “Stay Home,” it said, and one day when their daughter Kelley came to take her dad out to lunch, he refused to leave until he got clearance from Betty over the phone. “He relied on Mom to guide him and help him make choices. He trusted her to be in charge of what happened, and that was very calming for him,” said Kelley. “But he did these things to keep us happy, too. That was part of the plan he and mom had.” Gene would eventually move into assisted living at Valley VNA for 18 months and then move into the memory care unit for another 18 months.

 

Gene King passed away in September 2017 at age 81, and Betty and Kelley remain eager to help other families who face similar challenges with aging parents and partners. Betty is very active in helping her peers discover ways to care for themselves and their aging spouses. “It’s much more helpful to ask about you, the caregiver, than to only ask about how the spouse is doing. When you care for the caregiver, the rest tends to take care of itself,” she said.

 

 

Words of Wisdom

Here are a few nuggets of wisdom Betty and Kelley learned while accompanying Gene through Alzheimer’s:

  • It is much more rewarding to engage in a three-way conversation with a person who has Alzheimer’s instead of one-on-one. The affected person can join or recede from conversation without a lot of pressure to keep up with the discussion or formulate responses on the spot. They also suggest not asking a lot of direct questions because it can cause anxiety.
  • Condition yourself to accept change, because it will happen whether you want it or not. Keep a sense of humor and laugh with one another about the quirky things that happen!
  • Live in the moment. Go where your person goes, whether it’s down memory lane or a strange story about what happened at lunch today. Correcting or arguing only causes both of you to get upset, and you simply will not “win.” Stop being mad and accept your new reality.
  • After Gene’s move, Betty was able to get rest and peace so she could remain healthy and happy.
  • The women suggest finding one or two good friends who want to listen to how you are doing as a caregiver without judgment or uninvited advice. Good listeners will help you parse what is happening in your life and how to best face your next steps.
  • Moving into Valley VNA offered Gene more social interaction and programs that challenged him to remain engaged. He made new friends enjoyed his time living there.
  • While still living at home, Gene and his daughter Kelley had regular weekly dates at Lyrics and Laughter, a music enrichment program at Valley VNA for people with dementia and Alzheimer’s disease and their caregivers. “It was the highlight of my week to spend that time with Dad,” she said.  Later Betty attended the program with Gene for nearly the entire time he lived at Valley VNA.  “It is important to find activities you both enjoy.  Also, it is good to spend time with others at similar points in their lives.”
  • There are gifts hidden in the midst of a big move. After Gene moved to Valley VNA, Betty reclaimed her role as his beloved because she no longer had to be constantly vigilant about his daily personal care and safety. Gene’s eyes lit up whenever he heard her voice, he looked forward to sharing affection every day, and he authentically expressed his love for her. Kelly noticed, “Here we are, in this horrible situation where we all know we are losing him to Alzheimer’s and yet here is this gift, this second chance at their love.”

 

The mission of Valley VNA is to provide quality choices for senior living. Every day we are honored to care for our residents and clients in a way that helps their spouses and families live safer, healthier, and more peaceful lives, too.

 

Meet Jenna Weber, Certified Geriatric Pharmacist, Morton LTC

 Assisted living and skilled nursing homes rely on daily or twice-daily deliveries of prescriptions for their residents. The medications arrive pre-portioned from a long-term care pharmacy (generally, a pharmacy that does not have a storefront, but specializes only in pharmacy for assisted living and nursing home residents). The medications are prescribed by residents’ doctors and are distributed, or “passed” by specially trained caregiving staff. One of the most important health care responsibilities of long term care facilities is consistent, safe, and accurate medication distribution.

Valley VNA Senior Care contracts with Morton LTC of Neenah for its resident prescriptions. We are very fortunate to have on our Morton LTC team a board certified geriatric pharmacist, Jenna Weber, PharmD, BCGP. As a specialist in pharmacy for seniors, Jenna is one of only 47 board certified geriatric pharmacists in Wisconsin, a certification that requires rigorous preparation and study beyond traditional pharmacy school.

Meet Jenna and learn why it is valuable to have a board certified geriatric pharmacist consult at your loved one’s assisted living home:

My job is to help seniors live happier, healthier lives by assisting them to take their medications safely and appropriately. As we age, our bodies and brains change and our medications should change accordingly. I carefully monitor which medications are used and at what dose to ensure adjustments are made to accommodate aging residents. I review medications to see if there are any medicines a resident is taking that he or she no longer needs or needs in a lower dose.

A current national issue centers on the proper use of antibiotics, a term called antibiotic stewardship. It is important to reserve antibiotics for use only when a patient is truly ill from a confirmed infection resulting from bacterial overgrowth (not viral infections). Unnecessary use of antibiotics can result in especially negative side effects for an elderly person. Also, when antibiotics are overused or prescribed incorrectly, bacteria can develop a resistance to them and these medicines may not be effective against infections in the future.

I also review and coordinate prescriptions from multiple prescribers for the same patient to prevent drug interactions and avoid using medications that duplicate one another. Because a resident consolidates all of his or her medications to Morton LTC when he or she moves into Valley VNA, our pharmacists perform a detailed medication review at the beginning of our service and as medications or resident health conditions change. If we find a potential problem, we contact his or her health care provider to ask questions or make suggestions.

As a geriatric health care provider, I consider the natural aging process and how these changes affect seniors’ bodies, including their absorption and response to medications. I review each person’s medical diagnoses, including how well their body removes drugs from their system (for example, their kidney function), and how they respond to the medications they are currently taking. After reviewing this information, I make recommendations for any necessary prescription changes to Valley VNA staff and the patient’s provider.

Fall prevention is a very important part of my consulting work. Whereas a younger person may stand up too quickly, feel a bit dizzy, and swiftly recover, an older person who falls can experience life changing injuries. I oversee prescription dosages and potential drug interactions to help prevent lightheadedness, dizziness, or confusion that could lead to falls. If a resident is taking medications that potentially increase his or her fall risk, we alert Valley VNA staff and the resident’s doctor to discuss safer alternatives.

The cost of prescriptions has long been a concern for residents and families. Part of my role is to recommend generic drugs to replace a more expensive brand name medication when possible. Most pharmacies will do automatic generic substitution unless the provider indicates a brand name drug is required.

Our pharmacists consult with assisted living community staff members on a regular basis. We help educate facility staff and patients about a variety of medication-related topics. We work with caregiving teams to ensure best practices in medication handling, compliance with long-term care laws, and preparation for audits by their regulating bodies. A Morton LTC pharmacist is on call 24/7 if emergencies arise concerning resident prescriptions.

Dementia care and hospice care are two specialized areas of pharmacy practice that are an ideal fit for a board certified geriatric pharmacist. We are trained to follow a resident’s cognitive changes and adjust his or her medicines to attempt to slow the progression of dementia, keep the resident as healthy as possible, and allow him or her to engage with others to find joy and fulfillment. It’s a delicate balancing act because change is constant, whether it is cognitive loss or terminal illness. I find this to be one of the most rewarding aspects of my job because I am able to improve a patient’s quality of life and help ease the worries family members and loved ones.

 

Meet Paul, new Valley VNA Board Member

When you first meet Paul Verbeten, you see how he was in the glee club in college at UW-LaCrosse. He moves and speaks confidently and exudes a kind of energy best described as motivational. As he recounted his career path prior to his recent retirement, he even laughed about his early failures: trying to sell copiers, and later, kitchen appliances. Paul finally hit his stride in the mid-80s after a tip from a patron at the Out-of-Town Club where he was biding time as a bartender near his hometown of Wrightstown. “Thilmany is looking,” his friend told him. “Are you interested?”

Paul got his first big break as a salesman for Thilmany Paper in the Chicago market. Then a stint at Milprint in Milwaukee, where he helped oversee the production of millions of Snickers candy bar wrappers, led to an even bigger opportunity when the company was purchased by Bemis. Paul eventually retired in 2016 as the president of Bemis Healthcare Packaging where his responsibilities included regular travel to plants in Puerto Rico, Malaysia, China, and Ireland to work with his global operations team.

Feeling Connected to the Cause

Paul watched his own parents age and was present in their lives up until their last days. “I am happy to say I played golf with my dad when he was 88,” he said, just one year prior to his father’s death. His mother had Alzheimer’s disease that took away her ability to recognize and communicate with her own family. She eventually passed away while living in an assisted living community in Wrightstown. “I know what it means to care about aging parents and to think about how I want to be cared for,” Paul said.

Valley VNA Board President Frank Kearny, also a Bemis man, recruited Paul to the board of directors after his first year of retirement. “I knew Frank wanted me on the board, but I asked for a year to decompress (after retiring). When he called me again, and I already knew so many of the other board members, I signed on.”

Paul expects he will play a role in the financial aspects of Valley VNA’s operations, especially since daily profit-and-loss statements were part of his routine at Bemis. “I also think I’m good with people. I hope to help inspire and motivate people to continue their good work and to help with recruitment and hiring.”

Traveling Together (or Not)

Paul and his wife Peggy, a retired educational assistant with the Neenah Joint School District, spend several weeks in Florida each winter. This spring they plan to be back in Wisconsin in time for the birth of their third grandchild in early April. Baby number three will join Carter (3) and Frances (7 months) as a cousin at the center of family activities and affection. Paul and Peggy’s two daughters and their husbands, Annie and Kevin and Abby and Brian, live in Wisconsin:

When they are in state, the elder Verbetens go to St. Margaret Mary Parish in Neenah, but you will hardly ever see them there together. For decades, Paul has served as a cantor or choir member at Mass (remember the glee club?), and this puts the couple in separate parts of the sanctuary every weekend. He, his father, and his daughter Annie all were given the gift of a beautiful, uplifting voice. Valley VNA is very fortunate to have Paul join our choir of vocal supporters.